Under The Other Stands #4

We’re a bit late with our weekly football round-up. After a delay for Tuesday night’s inconsequential and offensively dull affair at the Abbey, here’s a summary of everything you need to know in the goings on of lower league football. After all, double game week in the EFL means two things:

  1. Double Under The Other Stands content.
  2. Double home disappointment for the U’s. We’ll skip over that bit though.

Calderwood said Tuesday’s performance was funny. We didn’t quite get the joke. There were, however, lols aplenty at Brunton Park as Hallam Hope scored the cheekiest goal of the season. It’s the old classic, the one we thought had been assigned to the history books; unsuspecting Notts County keeper Ryan Schofield hadn’t realised Hope was hiding at the back post when he rolled the ball ahead of him to kick. Hope pounced and rolled the ball home. Young Hallam couldn’t have hoped for better luck.

That was where the lols ended for Carlisle though as they slipped to a third defeat in five and dropped out of the play-offs. County’s impressive 3-1 victory sees them breathe a bit more life into their valiant dogfight. What is it with County goalkeepers though?

Luton’s Sonny Bradley became a viral hit after his reaction to being pushed by Bradford’s Lewis O’Brien. Whilst Juve’s Giorgio Chiellini was being mocked for his reaction to a push in their game against Atletico Madrid, Bradley was busy showing the world a proper reaction, showing top notch talent straight from his GCSE Drama class. It’s been a mighty week for the Hatters. The club, who are unbeaten in 24 and sit top of League One, also received the green light for their new stadium in the centre of the city. Initial designs for the ground unfortunately don’t include access to the away end via the bottom of someone’s garden, which is a shame.

  • Scholesy’s days are over

We thought it might not last that long, but not 31 days long. After one win, three draws and three losses, Scholes has left his post at Oldham Athletic. Maybe he just couldn’t handle the scalping he got at the Abbey? Probably not; his reasoning seems mainly based on goings on behind the scenes, and the board not quite living up to certain promises. Imagine that. Rumours are Zinedine Zidane has already reacted to the news, saying: “The best team I ever played against? Paul Scholes’ Oldham.

  • Movers and shakers

Milton Keynes FC’s surprise thumping at Morecambe sees them drop to fourth. Worryingly, it looks like Morecambe could be a League 2 side again next season. However, Morecambe’s third was a lovely, lovely hit.

Macclesfield’s Tuesday night game was postponed on account of their pitch being an atrocity that can’t handle some rain. Sol Campbell’s Silkmen would have been looking for a reaction after a home drubbing on Saturday by MK Dons. Campbell had made nine changes to the starting line-up on Saturday, posing the question, how big is that Macclesfield squad?

FGR’s good form continues, they dispatched fellow play-off hunters Colchester 3-0 in Colchester on Tuesday night. Meanwhile, Port Vale smashed Yeovil 3-0 in the big six pointer at the bottom. Yeovil are rubbish.

Bury didn’t play Tuesday night, so they’ll be nice and rested to tonk us on Saturday.

  • U’s in the news (sinking the blues)

Any Joe Piggott goal is worth its weight in gold, but one that condemns Peterborough to a defeat is extra special. Staying in Wimbledon, Kwesi ‘the GOAT’ Appiah’s recent resurgence has seen him called up to the Ghanaian national squad. It’s been three years since Kwesi was last in a Ghana squad, and his inclusion is at the expense of former Sunderland striker Asamoah Gyan.

There was also U’s nostalgia galore in Aldershot this week. Both Scott Rendell (could do a job) and Josh Coulson (could do a job) scored as Orient won 2-1. Josh is now on five goals for the season. Five goals. The same number as Jabo Ibehre. THE SAME AMOUNT OF GOALS AS OUR FIRST CHOICE STRIKER.

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And finally, Uche celebrated signing a contract extension at Hearts by grabbing a goal in their Scottish Cup quarter final win over Partick Thistle.

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